What is a pirate’s favorite place to eat? Arrrrrrby’s
Why did Pavlov have soft hair?
He conditioned it.
Did you hear the one about the three holes in the ground?
Well well well…
Why did the tomato blush?
It saw the salad dressing.
Its already been a tough year, but 2020 can’t end.
Because that would be admitting 2021.
I hate Russian Dolls…so full of themselves.
Ill see myself out…
Three men walk into a bar…you think the third would have ducked.
If I ever need a heart transplant I want his/hers. It’s never been used.
Why did the yoyoer bring toilet paper to a party?
He’s a party pooper.
That is sooooo baaaaad! Why am I chuckling?!?
Why did the skeleton burp?
It didn’t have the guts to fart!
Why do gorillas have big nostrils?
Because they have big fingers.
credit: snacks jr.
Q: What is “Muffins” spelled backwards?
A: It’s that thing you do when you pull them out of the oven
oh man, that was dad!
Not a joke per se, but now when I get undressed for bed I say…
Edit: messed up the joke
What do beer and frog legs have in common?
The hops.
It’s hard to explain puns to kleptomaniacs because they always take things literally.
When I was little , my parents would feed me alphabet soup, claiming that it was my favorite, but they were just…
…putting words in my mouth.
when you kiss your honey
and your nose is very runny
you may think it’s funny
but it’snot
Where’s the best place for us to keep our Dad jokes?
In a Dad-abase.