I was not a participant in this, but I think it is unfortunate what has happened. I have read the thread top to bottom, before chiming in. I hope that something is happening back channel to make things right for those who have not received anything. A gift by definition is something given voluntarily, without compensation. But, this was labeled a “gift exchange,” where there were rules attached to participation, qualifications, and there was the expectation that everyone would give and receive. There was an expectation of compensation (a return gift), so “gift exchange,” is an oxymoron in that sense.
Having said that, those who have not received something, should receive something, or the persons in violation of the guidelines should be optionally exposed, and/or receive negative feedback from their assigned recipient. The goal was to keep the process positive, a feeling of “giving.” What ruins that is not the person who has fulfilled the rules in their entirety and expects the other end of the bargain to be upheld. What ruins the feeling of “giving,” is the thought of the kind of person who would sign up for this kind of process, and receive something, then fail to fulfill their end of the bargain in return. If the idea of the thread is, “giving,” why are there people who have not given anything? It appears there may be a few who had the goal of signing up to “take” instead. I believe that those persons have caused any feelings of negativity, not those who kept their end of the bargain and are looking for an explaination about what went wrong.
While I think one or two people were impatient prematurely, by my standards, it ultimately appears their feelings were warranted, when to date, they have received nothing in the mail. I think people should be accountable for not holding up their end of the bargain. This means not necessarily holding someone to a specific date to ship, or to a specific price for the gift, but rather, maintaining the spirit of the deal, guidelines and rules and holding them accountable to their word. No one signed up to a process that required people be “qualified” to participate, to be let down.
I believe that the name of any giver, who has not shipped with tracking, should be given to their assigned recipient. They should work through P.M.s and provide the excuses to that recipient, for not shipping, or whatever circumstance in delay, that can be explained privately. It should be up to the assigned recipient, if they want to expose them in the thread and/or give them negative feedback as a result of the excuse they were given. That gives the recipient the chance to know why they got nothing, react if they choose, get closure, and alert others of the behavior. Let that serve as an example for those who participate just to “take.”
No one is perfect here, but if there has been ample time provided to make things right, and it has not been resolved, action should be taken. Take all of the above from someone who had a “shipping issue” with half my Secret Santa gift. I shipped out 2 boxes to him the same exact moment, via Priority. One box was delivered in 3 days, the other, about a week later. But, I had tracking, and my recipient had the heads up to expect the second box and he also had knowledge of it’s contents.
I hope this works out.
