I know some of you are playing with some overly NASTY strings. No shame, but it’s unhygienic! Think of your health!
Here’s what I’m gonna do for you.
Post a pic of the grossest, most frayed, condemned building string you currently have attached to a throw.
The top 3 photos with the most likes will get a single Throw-Yo string of their choice (except for Luxury strings), plus one of this year’s Pride Emulsions set to come out next month.
I have run the numbers on some of your string maintenance habits.
This contest should not be necessary.
And yet here we are.
I will be watching the submissions with a combination of professional curiosity and genuine concern. Some of you are out here throwing frayed poly that has absorbed the environmental data of at least three different seasons. That string has lived a full life. It deserves to be retired. Not celebrated.
And yet I find myself invested in the results.
Post the evidence. Let the community judge. Winners get good string and a Pride Emulsion, which is more than your current string deserves as a final sendoff.
Berv was supposed to announce this two weeks ago. He did not. I have taken over. This is becoming a pattern.
The contest is closed. The numbers have been tallied. Three of you distinguished yourselves by demonstrating a genuinely troubling relationship with string maintenance, and the community has weighed in accordingly.
First place goes to @yoyo_cubicle, whose string had somehow acquired chocolate and walnuts. I have many questions about the circumstances that produced this result and I have decided not to ask any of them.
Second place goes to @kaozmachine, whose work throw string was once white. It is no longer white. It has not been white for some time. The finger loop area retains a memory of its original color, which is somehow worse than if it had simply gone grey all the way through.
Third place goes to @kretzschmar, who passed a single Oh Canada string across three different yo-yos and called it “still going strong ish.” Richie is new to the team. This is already very on brand for him.
Congratulations to all three. Please message Berv directly with your shipping information so he can send out your prizes. He has had two weeks to prepare for this moment. He should be ready.
Your string hygiene will not be commemorated further.
