A month ago in class I asked my crush out in front of the whole class (I was dared by my friends), and her response was “nahhhh ewww” 
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“Hey babe, whaddya say we ditch this noisy bar and head out to the spillway where there are no witnesses.”
Still can’t figure out where I went wrong with that one and would love some enlightenment.
Ivan
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I said, ‘Hey baby, I don’t now how you escaped but I still have the keys to the Zoo. So if you wanna climb into the back of the truck, I’ll take you back to your cage. We can stop at the Feed Store and I’ll get you a bucket of something to eat’.
Oh well…
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Try that one again, I’m sure second times a charm lol.
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If you’re free, want to come to my house and help me move the bodies into the freezer? Never works for some reason.
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“Hey there, wanna see my YoYo?”
She laughed a bit in disgust, i think she was frightening when i showed it to her… we’ve been married 7 years.
Fyi it was a YYJ Hitmam 
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Damn that sucks. Who would turn down a man with a yyj hitman? That is peak stupidity
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Edit: my post got removed for being “inappropriate” please keep a reminder to not post something too graphic.
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At the bar to a nice lady.
“I can peddle a bicycle for over 5 hours straight. And I don’t even like riding a bicycle.”
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compete in the tour de france and ask her again, that would make your point valid
That’s just a Century time. A double Century took me about 11 hours. So I was being conservative.