Bullying is a huge issue all over the world, it’s something no kid, teen, or even adult should experience. From simple name calling to physical abuse, all of it leaves a scar in the victim. Bullying is very common, but for it to cause teen suicide, that’s when it crosses the line. For someone, or a group to back a victim so far into a corner that it feels as though the only escape is death, that’s when it is no longer a small issue a principal or teacher can fix. I’ll admit it, I have bullied kids before, why? To feel as if I have more “power” than them. I have also been bullied, and it does not feel good at all. In fact, it has probably even made me a bit unstable. I lash out at someone over the slightest issue, such as a small disagreement or just being called an idiot. Luckily though, some of my friends have sticked with me through all of this. Some of you have probably seen me lose my temper even on here. All of you have seen or experience bullying, and I bet none of you like it. Recently, as most of you have heard, Amanda Todd, on October 10th, 2012, committed suicide after being bullied. She’s just one of the thousand kids who have chosen death over further abuse. Next time when you find it “funny” to insult someone, hit them, create rumors, or talk about them behind their back, think to when you were being bullied, and how much it hurt.
Also, please share some of your own experiences with bullying as well.
I have never really posted this on the internet or gone public about it ever before but this post has made me want to now share the feelings I keep inside about bullying.
Bullying has sculpted me into the person I am today. From day one of school I was mercilessly picked on by my classmates, I was the weird kid, an outcast. I had my own friends. (the other kids nobody else liked) in elementary school it was petty insults nothing more. But in middle school It grew a bit violent. People throwing things at me in class, whispering mean things into my ear when I waited for the bus. I dreaded going to school. In 7th grade I punched a kid square in the chin for calling me a “not so nice word” and in 8th grade I got into a full blown fight with a kid who thought it would be funny to push me into a mud puddle. Because of these events I don’t like being around people, I am socially awkward and can’t talk to some people at my school because they were once the ones calling me names and pushing me around. It wasn’t until towards the end of my freshmen year in high school that I realized that people have slowly started to mature. It gets better, trust me.
I was bullied about my weight. I still sorta am, not to the extent of what it was In elementary scool. I acually have true friends to stick up for me and I stick up for them. In fact I can be an ass to people because of that. I want to say to people who are being bullied, there is help out there. Suicide is never the answer. Even cutting isn’t the answer. I have a friends who’s a girl who cuts herself. I’m trying to get her to stop. She says it isn’t deep and you can’t die from it. Yes you can. It’s not the wounds, it’s the emotional toll it takes on you. There is help. There’s a better way. Thanks yoyo spirit.
I was one of the fortunate ones that never really experienced bullying first hand. I was always an athlete, in the “popular” crowd, but I was always glad to be able to say that none of my friends would tolerate that sort of thing. In fact, I like to think we went out of our way to include people.
But I do have a story and I think that it might be great if even one person read it and took something from it.
In high school, I had a good friend (girl). I never really knew her sister that well but she also went to our school, one year older than my friend. One semester her sister was in my lunch period and at the beginning of that semester she would sit at my table. To be honest, I sort of felt like an outsider in that group since none of my really good friends were in that period.
Anyhow, I knew through my good friend that her sister at least had an issue with her weight. Even though she wasn’t really heavy at all, I also knew that she felt bullied about it. Being in that lunch with her, I could tell she wasn’t eating much, so this seemed like it might be a bigger deal than I knew about. Over the course of a few weeks this girl stopped coming to lunch. I let that go for a week or two before I figured out she’d be in the library by herself, not eating.
I didn’t really know what to do about it but I decided I wasn’t just going to let that happen. Even though I didn’t know her very well, that’s not ok to me. I also thought that maybe since we weren’t close, I might be in a better position to help than someone she was very close to and might be embarassed in front of.
So, about 3 times a week I would go up to the library with my lunch. I didn’t say anything about my suspicions, I just sat with her. I could even tell she was embarassed and wanted me to leave. But, I’d still go up there and chat. Try to make it not awkward. I’d always bring a little extra food and just sit it there. Didn’t say anything about it, just left it out there until I left in case she wanted to take it. If she didn’t, I’d just take it back with me.
This went on for a while. Maybe 2 months. She no longer seemed embarassed anymore and we were actually friends. Occasionally, she would even take the extra slice of pizza or whatever it was. Eventually, that semester ended, lunches assignments switched, and we never said a word to each other about the reason I had been going up there.
A year and half later we graduated. It was summer, and I was looking forward to college, as I gathered she was also. We hadn’t really spoken all that much since the lunches. But one day, about a month before high school was to become a distant memory, I got an email from her. It was short. Just a paragraph. She wanted to tell me that those visits helped her through a really tough time, and although we never talked about it, she knew what I was doing and it made a big difference to her. She just appreciated that I was there, and it was something even her best friends hadn’t done.
Moral of the story. You can be that person that keeps this sort of thing from ecalating. You don’t need to have the right thing to say, you don’t have to get emotional, you can just be you. That can be enough.
Thanks for sharing guys, sharing personal feelings publicly is something very tough to do, and Stookie, that’s exactly what everyone should do. If everyone thought like you, then there wouldn’t be any bullies at all.
Yeah you would not belive how many times I have bin bullied at school it’s not even funny anymore the most common time is when I have gym the same thing happens every time and that is when I walk out to the gym the same girls every time scream ewe gross at me and if that weren’t enough…
that was someone In our own community who did that a community so small you could sneeze and miss our town that we live that’s just one person to sum up want you said about suicide
I am so sorry you get bullied at school like that. Gym class was brutal for me too. My entire middle school experience was a nightmare to tell you the truth. The other guys would throw me in the sticker bushes or pick me up and play catch with me. They would stuff me in trash barrel with my feet up around my head and then gather a crowd to watch me wiggle and wiggle to get out. I know what it’s like to be bullied. It’s hard, somedays very hard.
Let me tell you a quick story. There was one kid, his name was Steve, who was harder on me than most. He would wait for me after school and throw my hat and coat over the tennis court fence where I couldn’t reach them in the middle of the winter and I would have to wait for someone to come by to help me out. He’d stuff me in a closet and then put a broom handle through the door handles so I couldn’t push it open from the inside and escape. Steve was so mean and he made me so mad. I was complaining about it all around the dinner table one night and my Dad asked me if he could suddenly make me a lot bigger and stronger what would I do. I told him I would teach that Steve a lesson he’d never forget! I’d march right up to Steve and knock his block off. I would beat the livin’ daylights outta him. That’s what I would do. My Dad just smiled and said; “You see, you’re not any better than him. You’re just smaller.” Then he said something I found quite peculiar, he told me my problem was I didn’t know how well I had it. He asked me if I knew where this Steve lived. I told him I did. He said; "Do me a favor. Tomorrow after school ride your bike past his house and see what it’s like. The next night at dinner my Dad asked me if I had rode past Steve’s house. I said I had. “And what was it like?” It was a dump. There were old junk cars sitting around the yard. There was garbage strewn all around. Some old drunk guy who I assumed was the father was lying in the back seat of one of the cars moaning. The house was filthy and all run down. My Dad asked how I would like to go home to that after school every day, “You see son, your problem is you don’t know how great your life is.”
He was right.
Years later after I had graduated from high school my parents were standing in line at the Maid Rite, (that’s a chain of sandwich shops in Iowa) when this stranger walked up to them. He asked; “Excuse me are you [Banjo]'s parents.” They said they were. “Well my name’s Steve Parson’s and I want you to know your son is one of the greatest guys I ever knew when we were going to school.” He told them how proud they should be of me their son and how he wished he could have been more like me. But it wasn’t me to whom goes the credit, it was my Dad teaching me where the true treasure of life is to be found, in a nice home, in the bosom of a loving family.
Still Abby, I’m sorry there are some who are mean to you. I can’t understand it myself because I know you are pretty doggone special!
Hang in there kiddo.
that made me tear up.
I am sorry for your rough expierence, but I quoted you because I had a VERY similar issue.
My whole life was torture. Each day, dreading more and more to go to school the next day. I was 8 when I wrote my first suicide note, and tried to hang my self from a ceiling fan at age 10. I still have a scar on my neck. I was always the weird one. The one who talked to much, and tried to befriend anyone. I had 2 friends, and only two friends at a time. During elementary it was Ashish and Erik, and during middle school it was Michael and Tommy. Always those two friends that nobody else liked. I wrote dark poetry as my mind grew weary of the constant insults, which didn’t help the situation. At the last day of middle school, I was pinned up against a cement wall and got a dodge ball thrown at my head, leaving the back of it blood red. The only time the school stepped in was when I pushed a kid down the stairs. He called me “fat”, let us not go into detail. I am/have been overweight for the past 3-4 years, that is something I despise about myself. I got expelled from the school, even after contacting the principle several times. I am now doing online school as a sophmore, and yet, the torture is still unavailable. I was followed home by a kid in my neighborhood who was high off of something (I live in a very poor area), and he slapped my cheeks, and wanted to fight me. When I turned around, he punched me and pulled a switch blade out. Then, he backed away and ran. Never saw him again.
Since my various bullying stages, I have been on HEAVY Anti Depressants, been clinically diagnosed with Manic Depression and Mental Trauma, severe anger issues that I tend to take out on myself and have had 4 years of constant therapy. Even if I was the happiest person in the world, I would still feel uncomfortable with the looks I get in public…
I started to play and tinker with yoyo’s because of a drug problem. I tried suicide with Tylenol, and had to have my stomach pumped. I was sentenced to rehab for 3 days, and was terrified. At age 14, I was a habitual smoker. I smoked about 5 cigs a day for 6 months, and yoyos help me quit. I have been 100% sober for a year now, but cannot leave my house in fear of getting beat up.
YoYoing is one of the small things in my life that gives it meaning. I am sorry for wasting your guy’s time, but please think twice before calling that fat kid without any friends a name. Think twice before ruining his life, please.
Please, don’t ever think there is anyway out other than suicide. If you think there is no where else to turn, we will always be there for you. If you need someone to talk to, don’t hesitate to PM me. Trust me, you do have a meaning in life. I’m really proud of you for picking up a yoyo instead of a cigarette. I cannot relate to you in any way possible to the extent of what you’ve been through. But I’ll always be there if you need someone to talk to.
It means alot… I haven’t thought about suicide for a long time. This community has been very generous to me
Yup me too!
Ditto. Kids can be horrible to each other without thinking through the consequences. If you ever need to talk to someone or just want to vent about something, feel free to PM me.
But yeah, bullying is the worst. It’s becoming way to common, and the future generation of America is going to suffer greatly if someone doesn’t put a stop to it.
I’ve always wondered how home schooling works. Do you still have to go into schools to sit the exams?
Homeschooling= school done at home.
So nahh, no school nothin.
But homeschooling is basically like this: there are a whole bunch of books for each different subject, and there is a planner for each subject.
Every day, except weekends, you follow that planner for the certain subject, and do the work in the said planner.
EG: ‘history planner says to read 20 pages of history monday’
I read 20 pages of history Monday
‘math planner says do lesson 1’
I do lesson one.
BTW, the teacher is basically your parent/ yourself/ your book.
I’m the normal dude in school, not really as popular, but not a person who has no friends, or has bullying problems either. I’m really the kid that kinda talks to everybody, has a close circle of friends, but cannot join the shallow nature of most friendships with “popular” kids, due to my intolerance of people like that. I really detest popular kids not because I have problems with them personally, but because of how the majority of them treat other, more unfortunate kids.
When I try befriending people, I look for people who don’t have friends, and sit alone every day. My whole circle of friends of mine and I go to that person and talk. A lot of my closer friendships were forged this way.
There was an autistic child in my class, who had no friends. Everyone would patronize him, make fun of him, and treat him badly. My friends and I stepped in, and we called the bullies heartless jerks, and asked them why they were trying so hard to make people feel bad. Mind you, this was in the middle of the quad, where everyone was. People gather around, and lucky for us, they sided with my friends and I. This was literally one of the happiest moments in my life. Turns out, the autistic kid was a really good player in TF2, a game that I like too. We became awesome friends, and we are also the best team in TF2 you can find.
The best darn team. Ever.
You are the kind of people who I watch from across the cafeteria and make me smile because it reminds me that there are still good people in this world and in my school.
Ok, I used to be bullied a lot, around 3-7th grade. Heck, a kid even put glue on my chair in 7th grade. Around 7th grade though, I started noticing something. I was a lot stronger than my bullies. I started picking fights with anyone I thought was trying to insult me. It became an impulse for me to try and intimidate. Part of the reason was because I didn’t want to be put into the same spot I was in. I became the bully soon. I started to bully what used to be my bullies. Even now, I still get easily angered. After hearing about what happened with Amanda Todd, I felt like this was not ok. How I was acting wasn’t what I wanted to be like. The message is don’t act like I did. Don’t become the bully.