How yoyoing saved my life- (This is long but a true story)

Hi every one my name is Alex ReVeal, I have been yoyoing for 4 years now, and I have story to tell, I know I am not that active in the BST and on the forums but I had an epiphany the other day and decided it was good enough story to tell…

So I will start at the beginning CAUTION GRAPHIC CONTENT AHEAD

When I was in third grade the YoYo man came around and did all the tricks in the assembly and immediately caught my heavily ADHD influenced attention. The next day I immediately begged my parents to get me one of the 40$ yoyos for sale in the catalogue handed out from the day before, so for the next few years I would mess around with loopers and all responsive yoyos thinking that was the only possibility in a yoyo.
Then one christmas morning I open up a yomega maverick, the first metal yoyo I ever owned. My early child who contained a lot of self hatred and emotional problems, I had no medication for any of my emotional defects. So a distraction from my personal hell that was my mind was to learn how to yoyo. I put that dvd in my xbox and started to learn. Having a very high IQ allowed me to learn the whole dvd in a week, but I craved more, by this time my depression and anxiety developed int o a large problems. My mind started thinking about things it had never thought of before. I came into my freshman year craving trouble and mischievous actions. My expectations for myself that social pressure just pushed me further down, as well as the constant pressure from school, trying to get a 4.0 just so my parents would leave me alone. The whole time my love for yoyoing grew and grew and grew to a point that after a year I improved my skills of yoyoing to a point I was making my own tricks and creating new concepts. I was battling depression like a monster. I got into some bad stuff and lost my self. When I finally climbed out of the hole I fell into I realized the rope I was hanging onto was made out of yoyo strings. (Thats a metaphor) Going into sophomore year I was loaded up on so many antidepressants and antianxiety medications that I couldn’t think. I couldn’t feel emotions. I was a zombie and had no control of my mind, but one thing brought a smile to my face… The ring of a yoyo spinning, the feeling of polyester string rubbing across your fingers, the new ideas and creations developing. It pulled me through the year. Then i went to my first BAC contest and just watched as people who were exactly like me walking around sharing they’re love of yoyoing. I came into my junior year very scared… I was taken off most of the medication and I had been going to the gym twice a day taking supplements, but I had nothing to get rid of that feeling of self hatred and constant insecurity.
I crashed and burned hard. I was in a very dark place the third week of school, feeling unloved, alone, and sad, I searched for a way out. I knew the easiest way but I knew it was the wrong way, but the other way was up, but there was nothing and no one to hoist me up, my friends would call to me and try and give me their hand but it was too damn high. Then I remembered what I used before. Over the summer I focused on lacrosse and body building and lost sight in the old hobbies I had. So I said, what the hell, and picked up my yoyo and threw. For hours on end I would throw every night, try and create, practice, create a routine, improve. Slowly but surely I built that rope. I threw it up to no avail… I almost lost it again, almost broke and almost gave up… But wait, I could make the rope longer.
I worked day and night to make that rope longer and eventually did. I took another throw and it caught on something. I was weak, very very weak. I climbed it took a long time, but I finally made it out. Now the only challenge is not to fall back in.

Here I am, half way through my junior year, still holding my yoyo, knowing how safe I was with it around. Gives me motivation to face every day with a smile on my face.

Now let me help you understand more,

  1. I yoyoed up to 6 hours a day
  2. I suffer from manic depression and extreme anxiety
  3. I have had many attempts
  4. The only thing that kept me alive is a yoyo

yoyoing saved my life. ;D

(Feel free to share any other stories on how yoyoing saved your life or got you through a hard time)


remember: there are always people who love you, and people to talk to. it isn’t painless when you leave everyone in pain.
it’s always cool to read about the small things in life that get us through tough times whether it be a yoyo, ball, music, or whatever else. these small things that we find solace and joy in can save our lives as it has yours. it really gives meaning to the phrase “enjoy the little things in life” while I haven’t had many times where I’ve been in such a dark place, I know how getting lost in an activity can be therapeutic and clear our heads of bad thoughts. I hope you can continue to stay positive. :slight_smile:

I am actually psychologist, and while it’s inappropriate to give formal and specific advice over the internet (and I won’t), I will say something that is generally true.

When people suffering from some sort of pathology, especially anxiety related ones, they often create rituals or routines that ease the anxiety. It’s completely normal and, to a degree, can be helpful so long as they aren’t all consuming or dangerous. Your interest in yoyoing is a healthy way to redirect some of those feelings if it works for you.

But, the point I’m getting around to making is that even after success, people always tend to credit the ritual or anxiety reducing behavior for the success. “It was because of yoyoing”. This is untrue. It is because of you. The yoyo didn’t make the choice to battle the anxiety rather than giving in. It was your success. This mindset, the realization that you yourself have the power to overcome these sort of feelings, is a MAJOR step to eventually learning to live with them, and maybe even without them.

So, keep building on your success. Now that you’ve taken a step, find other ways to challenge your fear about that anxiety. Every time you succeed that should serve as more mental evidence that there is no reason to fear it. Always be cognizant of that and don’t hesitate to give yourself credit when it’s due.


cynical bastardo post incoming.

in my head ADHD wordfilters to “my parents don’t slap me when i do stupid things”. For years it has been treated with a belt and not with pills.



someone will have to explain to me how anyone could think that giving chill-pills to a teenager is a good idea.

don’t get me wrong, i’m in 11th grade myself and i’ve ben through some rough and depressing times, but growing a pair and getting your **** together does miracles.

i’m sorry if i’m offensive, but these are some things about my generation that really grinds my gears.

the story itself is well written and interesting, and i agree, yoyoing is a good way to fill that empty space and time that we have, and not performing a suicide is pretty much always a good thing.

so enjoy the little things, go after what you really want and don’t forget to use your third finger when necessary.

sigh Please ,just leave these kinds of posts to the psychologists.Also ,if you’re going to say something like this ,I’m sure you could be more subtle and refrain from using the term “growing a pair” and “****”. This isn’t a rude forum ,and we all have our own problems ,so it really isn’t right to put yourself in his place like that. :wink:

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I was beat by my brother and emotionally abused by my parents, I was trying to keep the more graphic stuff away from the forum, but… I see that you want me to bring it up

And I see multiple psychologists and therapists for mental exercises that help with controlling my own mind, I completely understand where you are coming from, if you want to pm me for a little more info for your studies feel free I am very open about things

this shall be continued in the pm.

No ,I think it’s fine here.

Yoyoing never saved me from death itself ,but it has saved me from a life of boredom. It also gives me the confidence to learn all of the other things I do. I met some really awesome people through the yoyo community ,and I plan on meeting more. Heck ,I wouldn’t have even been a brony or known of squid girl if it wasn’t for Trace. There are so many like-minded people here. Another thing I love about yoyoing is that no matter how different people are ,we all seem to get along through yoyoing. It’s like some sort of bridge that connects us ,and I love it. I know a lot of us don’t seem eye to eye ,and some people don’t like what other people like ,but we all love to yoyo ,and that’s one thing we all share.

Exactly, the post is about appreciation for the hobby and the culture. I just thought I should share my story because it is the only way I can show appreciation.

this is a fantastic story, glad you made your way out of it so we can have you here on the forums :slight_smile:

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Your story touched me man, I have used throwing in a very similar way to save my life.
I was so hooked on OxyContin it wasn’t even funny I had even started selling to be able to afford my 300$ a day habit (that’s what it got to at its worst) I had nothing relationship wise and was so lonely.
So many times I felt it would be easier to end my life because in my own head I had tried rehab but would always relapse and I felt as if this was my denstiny. I eventually went to rehab a 4th time and completed the 4 week program and was released on January 26th 2011 so almost 2 years later I’m still clean. I would do so many things to try and keep my mind from those little pills but I had a voice reminding me the pleasure the oxy would bring. I eventually saw a yoyoing video on YouTube and immediately spent 10$ to get a YYf one. When I first saw that video I was brought back to 2nd grade sitting criss cross applesauce watching the Yoyo guy. I had over a year clean when I started to Yoyo but the cravings and thoughts I would have every single ticking minute of the day didn’t subside until I received that YYF one. I remember I would badger the guy who sold me the YYf one on eBay with questions. For the first time since having been clean I was enjoying life, even tho I could only throw it and I would just listen to the spin sound as well as watch it. I had found a escape and I immediately bought a Dv888 before even knowing how to bind. Without a Yoyo I feel like it would have been over for me all those thoughts about drugs I was having were surely going to take over and my addiction would have won.

Now 6 days from my two years clean mark I can share my story. I attend NA meetings often and have given away about 5 yoyos to other kids going thru similar situations. Some of the guys I gave yoyos too I haven’t seen but one of the dudes has gotten a lot better and is binding now and doing trapeze. I’ve been thinking of introducing yoyoing into some type of NA meeting because when I first started my recovery and I would attend a meeting, the last thing I wanted to do was sit and listen so I can imagine inspiring someone to Yoyo could really benefit someone wanting to get clean. I’m now 22 years old and I have so much to lose if I returned to opiates. I have a wonderful girlfriend and we will be celebrating one year tomorrow :slight_smile: she knows my history with drugs and helps me often. She’s never used drugs and has a great relationship with my family. I throw every single passing day even if its while I’m walking. Without the power of a Yoyo I can only imagine the spot I would currently be in. I will be an addict for the rest of my life because in my head I will always know that one pill can make all my problems disappear for a temporary time, and the fact that I know that is what makes me am addict. Relapse will not happen though, I’m tired of running in a circle chasing my tail expecting a different result.

Sorry that my story is so long, I’m just glad to hear that you’ve been saved by a Yoyo just like I feel I was because before I had gotten that YYf one even tho I was clean I was so depressed especially since I had to deal with all my problems sober. I wasn’t used to feeling anything let alone feeling emotions, had I not bought a Yoyo I would probably be hooked and hustling. I’m in college now and have a legit job and a wonderful Gf as well as my mothers trust which took so long to get back. OxyContin won’t ruin my life twice one was enough.

To anyone who read this thank you. Felt good to put my story somewhere. Especially since I doubt anyone who knows me on this forum would have thought I used to be a addict.

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Wow I’m appalled anyone from YYE forums would respond to a story of this caliber in the way you did.
You think it’s his fault that that he has depression most likely due to some sort of chemical imbalance in his brain? I have a feeling if he could help feeling depressed he would. You must not know anything about depression but yet you try and speak as if you do. Who are you to just critique him when you don’t know him? Instead of offering some encouraging words to show him how nice we care here on the forum you tell him to grow a pair? Maybe since you probably already “grew a pair” you should start planting the seed so you can grow some respect. That’s not nice man, not at all.

You don’t have to justify yourself man, he doesn’t matter enough to do so. There’s plenty of nice people here but of course every once in a while when someone opens up there has to be that one person who cannot resist. They can’t resist saying something rude. You’re doing great man. If yoyoing helps then keep it up like that guy said tho its you not the Yoyo.

Anyways keep your head up brother! Don’t be afraid to post people here are always caring, except occasionally you get the bitter rotten response.

Thanks for sharing such an intimate story with us. I’m glad you’ve climbed out of your hole. Keep up the great work and just know that we’re all here for you.


Just wanted to add some links for people who may read this thread in the future:

National Hopeline Network  ::  1.800.SUICIDE

National Suicide Prevention Lifeline  ::  1.800.273.TALK
For hearing and speech impaired with TTY equipment  ::  1.800.799.4TTY
Español  ::  1.888.628.9454

National Child Abuse Hotline  ::  1.800.4.A.CHILD

National Domestic Violence Hotline  ::  1.800.799.SAFE

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i talked a bit with him in pm, and i admit that my immediate reaction was wrong. he was not one of those angsty kids who can’t focus on a book for a few minutes and self-diagnose themselves with a mental disorder. just shows that first impression isn’t always right.

and i still don’t think that depression is something that you treat with medication. that’s just my opinion.

You’re right but you have to understand that desperate times call for desperate measures so I can understand why someone would try medication. I have my medical card and its always been great for me. I know not everyone would want to smoke weed instead of taking medication but it works for me.
Anyways I apologize if I was rude sorry man

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won’t argue with you there ;D

i hope no one is still mad, and let love and peace return to the land of YYE.

There’s a big difference between what most people consider “depressed”, and clinical depression. That’s not to say that all professionals on the planet would condone medication, there’s a school of thought for everything, but medication is a part of the commonly accepted treatment plan. Even if the person won’t require medication for the rest of their life, medication can often be useful early on to reduce the severity of a person’s symptoms such that they can participate fully in therapy and any other aspects of their treatment plan. For example, some patients very literally cannot get out of bed in the morning because they are terrified of what they might do, so for them, measures including medication have to be taken in order to get them into the office so they can make progress.

I know you apologized and that’s cool, but in the future I’d try to be mindful that expressing opinions based on very little information can be hurtful, especially when those opinions involve passing judgement on others. This is a very sensitive and often scary subect for people battling these kinds of disorders and that shouldn’t be dismissed.

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