wait, if you now know more about yoyo’s then how could you ask for a perfect one when it doesn’t exist?
For a realistic suggestion have you thought about:
One drop Aitch
GoodLifeYoyo’s Valley
YoyoFactory BiMetal
Sturm Panzer Starchaser
and Top Yo Cheapskate or TimeJacker?
Looking at your list of ones you want something like, why not just get the invictus?
I think the iYoYo iceberg hits all your marks except the quiet part. The new version is wider the classic is more narrow. That would be my pick at $69.
If you could go $10 more the Duncan Grasshopper GTX or the GTR might meet your wishes. I have the Grasshopper GTX and love it. The GTR is wider and I’ve heard good things.
I second the Iceberg recommendations with one small difference… embrace the loud go the other way with it, like I did, put a full ceramic in the Iceberg. I have put full ceramics in both my Iceberg and Poly Edge, I believe they are some of the loudest throws out, but the full ceramic makes them both scream. Also it removes about 1gm from the center weight the difference can be felt, like an overdrive was added. Accept the loud for the speed and power. That is my experience hope it helps.
I’ll also echo the recommendations for the Grasshopper GTX. It’s outstanding. Rock stable with tons of power at sub $100 price point. Unfortunately it is out of stock at yoyo expert but if you look you could probably find it discounted online elsewhere for under $69.