Dad joke thread

Unrelated Discussion
225

How does a dinosaur pay its rent? With Tyrannosaurus checks!

7 Likes
226

BOOOO I love it

227

which days of the week are the strongest?

Saturday and Sunday. The rest are week days…

kgb

11 Likes
228

My Dad’s fav and one and only….

How do you catch a unique bird?
Unique up on it.

How do you catch a tame bird?
Tame way!

8 Likes
229

why don’t oysters share their pearls?

because they’re a little shellfish.

kgb

8 Likes
230

I like the pulp fiction joke.

TLDR; Family of tomatoes. The older tomato says to the younger tomato: Ketchup.

3 Likes
231

The one I told my wife on our first date. Prop in hand.

I told her holding a remote in my hand (we where at a restaurant it made no sense but I was committed to this dumb line)

“You know, first time I saw a universal remote. (Takes a sip of drink) I thought to myself. This changes everything. (Place remote on table)” she somehow didn’t leave the date that moment.

Second date we rode bikes.

I ride up next to her. I hop
Off the bike. I ask her “do you know why bicycles fall over… (drops bike let’s it fall over) because they are two tired”

It’s been about a decade and two children later. I think back and feel those where the lines that got her hooked.

8 Likes
232

You know the fact that you brought a remote just for the sole intent of being able to make that joke is commendable. Bravo to you lmao

5 Likes
233

What’s a foot’s fav snack? Doritoes

6 Likes
234

A horse walks into a bar. The Barkeeper asks ‚Why the long face‘.

5 Likes
235

Whenever I drive by a cemetery I point it out and say, hottest club in town, people are dying to get in there!

4 Likes
236

Why did the pirate go see a movie? Because it was rated “arrr”

5 Likes
237

Dude. I like your style!!!

2 Likes
238

This one requires an answer from at least one person.

What is a pirates favorite letter???

4 Likes
239

Arrrrrrr

3 Likes
240

a beaver walks into a bar and asks “wheres the bar tender?” XD

4 Likes
241

You’d think it’s the Arrrrr. But it’s really the “C”eeee…

4 Likes
242

Two windmills are standing in a wind farm. One asks, “What’s your favorite kind of music?” The other says, “I’m a big metal fan.”

9 Likes
243

Why do chicken coups only have two doors?

If they had four doors, the would be chicken sedans.

Why do divers fall backwards out of the boat?

Because if they fell forward, they’d still be in the boat.

I dont teust stairs… they’re always up to something.

4 Likes
244

Loved this one from The Last of Us:

Did you know diarrhea is hereditary? Yeah, it runs in your jeans.

8 Likes