Definitely star. It looks better.
Best sitcom starring a stand up comic:
Seinfeld or Everybody Loves Raymond?
I have an insufficient 90’s hard drive in my head, but since I’ve only ever seen Seinfield, I have to flip a coin.
flips
That one it is.
Seinfield.
Pi, or the ratio of a circle’s diameter to its circumference?
The same, so I’ll choose Pi, because it reminds me of “pie” every time I hear it. I loved saying it in high school, cause I thought of food.
Spray antiperspirant (deodorant) or the stick?
The stick because you can beat your enemies with a stick, throw it to your dog, pretend it’s sword, sticks are awesome. No dog will play with spray antiperspirant.
Popcorn or Peanuts?
Popcorn, cause peanuts are the cheap nuts I’d only eat when they’re in a chocolate bar, or in butter form. 
When you sit on an airplane…
Isle seat or window seat?
Window seat, if I can.
People messung with your brain or with you.
You win the thread, my friend. But if I had to choose, I’d have to say me, since my head is a delicate BOMB WAITING TO EXPLODE IN A FIT OF- okay never mind.
Roller coasters or water slides?
Roller coaster, because I don’t like to be wet unless I’m bathing, and can’t swim.
Which one is cooler to find:
A half dollar or a $2 bill?
$2 bill
Reeses peanut butter cup of Hershey bar with almonds?
Almonds all the way
Pig bacon or turkey bacon
Piggy bacon.
Green eggs or ham?
Definitely ham.
Megablox or Magic Yo-Yo?
You. For real. Don’t.
Magic Yoyo, because megablox is just sad.
Skiing or snowboarding?
Please. Skiing. Snowboarding is too COLD, Goldilocks.
Green or black?
Black. The only thing I like green is money. 
Who would you rather meet in person:
Donald Trump or Bill Cosby?
Donald trump, so that I can do something to his weird (insert expletive here) hair. Like, a leafblower or something. Like this:
Saltwater or freshwater fishtank?
OMG!
I have to go with freshwater, I think that’s the one that’s easier to maintain.
Would you rather eat leftover pizza delivered from the day before or cook a frozen pizza and eat that instead?
I don’t like pizza, but the cooked one sounds better.
Rice Chex or Wheat Chex?
Wheat Chex (rice chex taste like cardboard with glue on top)
Petr or Vashek
Petr made one of my favorite tricks so…
7UP, Sprite, or Sierra Mist?