# So today I decided depression won’t win and I want to be good at yoyo **URL:** \ **Category:** General Yo-Yo\ **Created:** [November 13, 2026, 3:12am UTC](https://forums.yoyoexpert.com/t/so-today-i-decided-depression-won-t-win-and-i-want-to-be-good-at-yoyo/456617 "2026-11-13T03:12:08Z")\ **Posts on this page:** 2\ **Page:** 1
**Author:** ![Bznalcapone](https://sea1.discourse-cdn.com/flex015/user_avatar/forums.yoyoexpert.com/bznalcapone/32/710119_2.png) [@Bznalcapone](https://forums.yoyoexpert.com/u/Bznalcapone)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2026, 3:12am UTC](https://forums.yoyoexpert.com/t/so-today-i-decided-depression-won-t-win-and-i-want-to-be-good-at-yoyo/456617/1 "2026-11-13T03:12:08Z")
So most of you know and maybe some don’t I go through on and off spurts of depression I can go years and have no issues with depression, anxiety or panic attacks but for some reason i woke up 8 months ago in the middle of the night having a panic attack and from that day on my life spiraled. I have had severe panic attacks to the point where i pass out, anxiety to the max and depression so bad i lost interest in life itself I didn’t care if i died or not and i wanted to and i gave up. As most of you know that suffer from the same you know how difficult it really is once you get in your head how hard it is to get out of and when you have no friends to talk to being alone is no so great. 2-3 months ago I was watching YouTube and saw a yoyo contest and I was like yup I really want to do that and be good so I started buying yo-yos like crazy but depression wasn’t allowing me to pick up a yoyo so I kept buying and never doing anything with them. I would buy then put them in a shelf and never even touch them. Well today I got myself up and said I’m really tired of being depression and letting it control me so I picked up a yoyo and practiced binding, practiced my breakaway for many hours and practiced my side binding. I know you guys will think I’m crazy buying all these yo-yos and literally doing nothing either them but today I really enjoyed myself a lot and I want to become so good hat it’s just natural. Thanks everyone who has been kind to me and who has helped me in back and I’m ready to learn everything and become really good and sorry for the long read. I wish some of you lived closer to me would be nice to be able to practice with others and enjoy some yoyo company because no one around here does yoyo at all. PS: I want so many more yo-yos but I’m going to wait till after Christmas as funds need to go to the kids to see them smile. Also my son asked me why I feel like I am bad father he heard me talking to my wife about how I feel like I’m a bad father because I’m struggling mentally and I feel like I can’t take care of the kids when I’m struggling to take care of myself and that mad me realize I need to get my crap together ---
**Author:** ![stammig](https://sea1.discourse-cdn.com/flex015/user_avatar/forums.yoyoexpert.com/stammig/32/678917_2.png) [@stammig](https://forums.yoyoexpert.com/u/stammig)\ **Post date:** [November 13, 2026, 5:33am UTC](https://forums.yoyoexpert.com/t/so-today-i-decided-depression-won-t-win-and-i-want-to-be-good-at-yoyo/456617/2 "2026-11-13T05:33:37Z")
Been there brother. Will be again. Cycles suck. The part about the kids and being a dad hit me right in the gut. It gets better.